In traditional marriage ceremonies, the Priest says that the two shall become one but never gives a timeframe. This journey to becoming one is often marred with differences and conflict. A successful marriage requires that you answer the following 4 questions:
- What are our shared goals?
- What will our sex life look like?
- Are we interested in parenting?
- How will we manage our money?
Shared Goals
The early establishment of shared goals can create excitement and purpose as the marriage journey unfolds. These shared goals not only guide the couple’s path but also foster excitement for a future built together.
Sex Life
Equally vital is open communication about sexual preferences, frequency, and boundaries. Too often couples are embarrassed to talk through the details of how their sexual activities will unfold and this can negatively impact their need for intimacy.
Parenting
Parenting should never occur as an accident. Bringing a human into the world is so important that it requires a deep discussion to ensure that the couple is aligned on the number of children, the timing, and even the approach to discipline and development.
Finance
Goal setting, sexual preferences, and parenting will only be successful if there is a meaningful discussion about financial compatibility. Couples should openly discuss spending habits, savings, and financial goals, even if it results in maintaining separate accounts. Transparency becomes the bedrock, avoiding secret accounts and preserving trust. Honest communication ensures a clear understanding of how money will be spent and saved.
Becoming One
Understanding and addressing these aspects early on will create a solid, unified foundation for a successful long-term relationship. Failure to engage in these discussions may lead to future conflicts, separation, or divorce. It is crucial for couples to openly communicate and find common ground in these key areas to build a resilient and enduring relationship.
Author: Dennise Demming, MSc, MBA
Wellness Therapist, Communications Coach, Speaker
868 761 9426
Dennise Demming 
Becoming one requires the work and commitment and the commitment to work at it.
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I think understanding each other’s personal characteristic is critical. The man deeply requires to be respected / almost revered by his woman, while the woman requires to be cherished / deeply loved by her man. The giving required by each party is not natural and needs to be cultivated. Each needs to know how to do so.
Rae
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